Okay, I take it back

You guys, I feel so humbled. I didn’t write that post to be a humble brag. I didn’t write it so that people would beg me not to stop writing. I wrote it because I was disgusted with myself and all of the ways I’ve thought about promoting myself and reaching the next level and blah, blah, blah. I wrote it because somehow trying to create a successful online life was stealing the joy from my real life. And I forgot for a moment that I love my real life.

I love when a dear friend calls me and says, “I just need to talk,” and I get to love on her in the real ways that mean something in the kingdom of God. There is no fanfare for that, but it’s the real thing. I love when my girl says to me, “Mom, I just want to be close to you,” and I get to hold her tight and let her know that I will take care of her no matter what. I love that I get to start volunteering in her kindergarten class where I hope I can love on someone else’s kids who aren’t getting enough at home. I love when I snuggle up with my husband at night and he looks at me with eyes that say, “I really know you, and I wouldn’t change anything about you.” That’s the real stuff. That’s what I live for. And that’s what’s worth writing about.

So here’s the deal. I’m going to write about the real stuff in my life. And I refuse to care whether two people are reading it or two hundred. I’m just going to show up and be real. I hope you’ll join me, but even if you don’t it’s okay with me. And when I start getting crazy again and wondering why no one is paying attention to me and why I’m not successful, someone please remind me that I don’t care about that crap.

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